Move Over Material Girl - This is MaterialBitch.com

WARNING! MaterialBitch.com is definitely not a t-shirt site for the faint-hearted or faint anything come to think of it. Expect the foulest language and the cattiest blogging in history, these girls mean business and they take no prisoners, you’re either with them or you’re against them. Fortunately I’m with them, but I’m sure the moral majority are quaking in their boots and shaking their heads in despair already.

I can’t even feature half their t-shirts here because I have a general audience and there are always a few that will complain about the bad language, especially the F word. Then again, it’s a perfectly natural act, and none of us would be here without a little jiggy. Then again, I’m sure those who’d bother to complain would rather I called the particular biological function in question ‘making love’. If you’re one of the aforementioned I’d advise you stop reading now, perhaps take a sup of Camomile tea and have a lie down.

So, what apart from the bad language makes MaterialBitch.com stand out? Well for a start it’s not TshirtHell.com, in fact it’s nothing like it. If Tshirt Hell asked Material Bitch on a date I’m sure she’d kick him in the family jewels, and then most likely steal his credit cards and keys to his Harley, whilst he squealed like a piggy on the floor. MB, as far as I can tell, doesn’t have a particular ethos, it’s more what she hates than what she loves, this is a straight-talking t-shirt collection that will drop the jaw of most respectable mothers and fathers, although I’m sure there are some total ‘mothers’ at MB, but only in the colloquial sense :/

Don’t expect ugly whatever you do, these are well crafted, at times rather gorgeously crafted offensive tees, something you might expect in your goodie bag, if you’re famous enough and hadn’t left it in the toilets at the awards ceremony. Their sense of fashion is as glamorous as their disdain for most celebrities, trends, persons of a most persuasions, and just about every topic under the sun.

Their bledger (aka blog) is hilarious, but again, be warned, it’s full of foul language and outrageous almost slanderous opinions, but I love it, it makes a nice change from my own rather septic sceptic attitude to life. I’m writing from the perspective of someone who’s had 7 shades kicked out of him by life, MB, well let’s jsut say she prefers to kick, and you know if I was a material bitch I’d be doing exactly the same thing. Life is full of people like me, we sit and talk and discuss and grumble and finally fall asleep, but MB is out there causing trouble for the sake of it, and to be honest it sounds a lot more fun. They even have their own language over there, guaranteed to increase the clique-factor, don’t worry though, if you love it but you just don’t get it, you can take their correspondence course in Bitchology at the Bitchionary.

According to their blurb on the press page “MB’s identity will forever remain a mystery as a socialite and trend-setter in both Scottsdale and Los Angeles, both of which she calls home”. She attends top events with her celebrity and heiress friends, and then anonymously reports on this influential scene, spreading venomous gossip and fashion scoops and gaffs to a legion of adoring fashionista junkies. She’s also the head designer, has a graduate fashion school background who initially made exclusive one off T-shirts for her friends before pairing with a close group of influential business friends who have helped to build the brand to its current infamy. After a brief and total domination of the local market the team recently upped sticks to LA, MB began took on the global fashion market, now selling shirts worldwide, still a mainstay of the LA scene, her ever broadening online audience is spreading the word, a viral invasion of the high-end t-shirt sector is underway. Her tees range from $25.99 to $119, and each design is as you’d expect created to shock and that’s exactly what her customers want!

I can see a grand future for Material Bitch, if we can expect anything it will be an ever increasing range of shocking but gorgeous ‘course couture‘ designer tees, reams of celebrity scandal, and a near religious fanaticism for her brand by a worldwide legion of dedicated fans. A warning to Queen Madge, you may need a lie down after visiting MB, this is certainly not a place for burnt out, middle-aged pop divas.Iit’s time to put last generation’s material girls to bed, the long dark night of fashion has come upon us, and it is the era of the Material Bitch!