New Designs on Death at Dance Party Massacre

Dance Party Massacre was launched in Boston, MA in the fall of 2007. Created by Alex Dakoulas it came to be after many nights of dancing in kitchens, walks in the dark, and horror movies with friends. Here’s a rundown on a few of their t-shirt releases, and be warned, they’re a strange bunch who seem to be fixated with death and the dance floor. I’m not sure if this is the kind of thing I should be encouraging so don’t take it too seriously if you happen to be a dangerous nutter who loves clubbing, it just won’t stand up in court.

I like their dualistic fatalistic/optimistic approach to life, I’m guessing they’re aiming their wares at a younger crowd, they even include a few bandanas in their collection, although the designs themselves aren’t too hardcore (don’t expect graphic blood and guts on your chest), and the message is loud and clear every time.

Their blurb for their Start Living t-shirt reads ‘…go out and live your life, because you could be dead (sic) any day. In our world, that means something is going to kill you so WATCH YOUR BACK!’ - which to me sounds like a bad case of paranoia but seeing how screwed up we’ve left this world for the next generation I’m not surprised. I’m not old or conservative enough to see this as a sad indictment of society today, and I’m not young and wacky enough to wear it, but even I can see the positive message here.

I suppose it’s a backlash to the tattered remains of the glib and simplistic message of the post-hippie movement, sooner or later you’ll meet someone who honestly thinks that a little organic farming and a Smart Car will help save the world. I wish it was that easy. The ice caps are going to melt, we can’t stop them now, the world is going to flood, the sun is dimming and weather cycles are so erratic now that seasonal crops will begin to fail across the planet over the next decade or so.

I don’t even imagine we’ll be lucky enough to hang on to a dystopian nightmare, there won’t be time, imagine the Dark Ages but worse. Yes we can all help out and recycle and clean the earth and delay the inevitable, but it’s true any of us could die tomorrow, be it a flood, a fire, a traffic accident, you name it, fate sucks. Yes I do have the Monday Morning blues, ignore me :/

Ouch! Blood on the Dance Floor continues the macabre theme, you really have to be into this stuff or not, I don’t think it’s for the middling crowd, don’t expect subtlety from DPM, their straight to the point tees are for one purpose alone, to separate themselves from the rest of the crowd, or in other words, your mum and dad won’t like it.

I rather enjoy the clear cut (no pun intended) style here, the electric blue t-shirt certainly draws the eye into the pool of blood (what am I saying?). I don’t know, it really has to be the Monday morning blues, does anyone else on this planet get spots in their late thirties? I’ve been told I should cut back on everything I enjoy and stick to herbal tea and rice cakes, but I just can’t imagine it.

I used to go clubbing years back, even went to a few illegal raves on the M25 orbital, I saw a few fights, but mainly managed to avoid them, perhaps it was more ‘loved up’ in those days. Gawd knows what the they take these days, last I heard it was ‘K’ - which is a horse tranquilliser, I suppose it would help the pain if anything like this happened.

Just a minute I think I have some reinforced steel-cap safety boots somewhere if you think your local club leans this way.

DPM sponsor quite a few club nights in the Massachusetts area if you fancy showing off your scariest t-shirts, they just held their last one at Compound, a monthly dance party that jumps from venue to venue around Boston. This time it was at Great Scott with performances by 3 bands, sets from 2 DJs. Don’t blame me if you find someone at their next session wearing your new t-shirt, you’ll find quite a few DPM fans at their sponsored nights!

Something’s After Us is definitely influenced by the Friday The Thirteenth movies, a classic slasher horror franchise. They’ve made full use of luminous inks and I really like the alter-ego of this t-shirt - see the ‘night version’ here. Essentially all the clubbers have been erased from history and all that remains is the ice hockey mask motif.

As with the others it’s another upfront and in-your-face design meant to sift out those who aren’t joyfully pessimistic, those who don’t face each day as it’s last. I really used to feel like this, live life in the now, for the moment, but in truth you get old, you make plans, you hopefully accomplish a few goals, make deeper relationships and manage to connect with like-minded souls and then eventually die.

I can’t tell you when you’ll die, but there’s an interesting article at Wired.com’s Archive called ‘One Million Ways to Die‘ - and essentially the front runners are Driving off the road, Falling and Accidental poisoning. So my advice is, whatever you do, if you do decide to drive up a mountain today, steer close to the cliff edge and reach around for that bottle of water, check the label before you take a gulp.

Take it easy or not, live life how you want to, you might die tomorrow. On the other hand you may live to a hundred or more and if you’ve ever met a centenarian they are more than likely to tell you long life sucks. A lot of us like to hold on to something to believe, something to explain the chaotic and haphazard nature of the universe, but the truth is you’re going to do what you’re going to do, and there isn’t much anyone else can do about it. It’s like a housefly deciding what furniture to buy for the apartment they happen to be buzzing around, our final fate is completely out of our hands. So make the best of it, life that is, good or bad, and try and learn something if you can, and if you can’t at least have some fun.